Oil on canvas
65 x 81 cm
There are a lot of self-portraits appeared between 2005-2010. Red-haired girl is always like a mirror with life, thoughts & feelings of painter. Those continuing series of portraits shows changes in the artist’s life. It is like a time line with images.
*Red moments…* includes A lot of red color, probably the name is coming from this point. Red is a color of Passion, main feeling of her life.
Hair is red and has an unusual shape. It tells how many feelings, thoughts, colors are born and live in her mind now. Different ideas appeared in her mind and ask to go outside, to canvas, to life. Anyway same as every where in her works there is an unchanged personage – sky. Which is broken in many pieces here between this huge red masses. One piece of sky is set in the cage. Strong but fragile figure of red-haired girl gently holds this cage. Carefully and carelessly in same moment. Upper hand puts cage on risk and lower hand is ready to rescue it in any moment. I remember * Freedom in the cage* of 2005 with cage filled of lonely sky. Here in *Red moments…* sky is not that lonely but with two little birds inside of the cage. And lower hand is ready to take care of this little pair of birds. It seems she is intending to save them and their love at anytime…
This portrait is a first work which beginning this series.
I was reviewing the works I’ve done during the recent period of my life and I came to point – I’m feeling pretty enough (even: ENOUGH) of Blue Color. Middle 2008 till Fall 2009 – period I am talking about. I was thinking why “Blue” is dominant. Well the point I guess is clear when I feel not good = I am feeling “Blue” and just transmit it on canvas. I check works of 2007 – and same thing is there. Period of my life when I am feeling “blue” – sad, bored, not ok, life is seemed stopped in strange hung condition, nothing happened or at least not what I wanted to happen, and yada yada yada…
Ok so for this moment I was thinking that I am pretty ready to change blue to whatever… And then I decided to set me a couple of portraits painted each one in special color gamma… So this one is supposed to be red, however I had doubts. Idea came to my mind to paint girl with huge hair bunch on her head ( inspiration for that came from many historical movies I watched…) I was going to search for photo references of that hair style, but it came to me itself… ( latinstock perú – facebook page)
I am sure I am not alone here with finding exactly necessary things when they are on my mind… Or seeing that people are working on same ideas exactly in that very moment. I usually explain it as: Ideas are floating in the air up there somewhere in the atmosphere and we have access to it. But just some of us are using that information.
I began to work on it, but still had hesitation about background. It didn’t take me too long to find out what I can do with it…
Also I was using here a 3D effect of painting hair. So this canvas CAN’T ever be rolled.
Strange feelings of first flying, I never used planes before that time, I never left my hometown before that time, I never was in the air before that time… But feeling was realy strange… It was night, and I hardly could understand that I was on the plane flying. It seemed more like I was used a bus, such type as those ones which run between cites. Everything was too strange. All thoughts about what will be there, hopes for the best, and I dont know why but in my mind during all those flight hours I remembered the lines of one strange short poem, written by one friend of mine…
Man, you sure are bright girl! Were you raised by the stars?
I was just checking your tag to see if you were made in heaven.
Is that a run in your stockings, or is it the starway to heaven?
If beauty were crime u;d be doing life
I’ve lost my house key can I have urs
Save water, shower with a friend
Can you help me find my puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room
If I had a Library card i would check you out
You’re so hot you would make the devil sweat.
Just because yoour computers are incompatible, doesn’ mean we are.
Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away!
However I don’t know did he write it himself or just used. But anyway these lines appeared in my mind and touched my heart soooooooo painfully, even made the tears appears in my eyes…
But I was not alone, I was with my mom… 5 or 6 hours, we were flying, I don’t remember exactly. Time passed quickly. We already were in the land and suddenly in that moment I felt so real how much cruel life can be… I mean how much cruel people can be. ( Because Life is a subject, not an object. Life is such people do it)
It was raining when we landed, little, but so unpleasant… The first bus was full and the girl so cruelly pushed me from the door, like I was not a person, but like I was an animal, which is impossible to understand words, and only understands actions. But i didn’t pay so much attention to it in that very moment, I thought ok probably she had a bad day.
Nobody met us, we were absolutely alone. But we needed to think quickly, and decide how to be. We are in St.P., in the airport, next to South part of city. So while we were standing at the control of checking the documents we were talking to girls, about where we can get connection for my cellphone, to buy sim card, or even to find a telefone, to call for taxi. They said somewhere in airport. So as soon as we were going to get our things and get documents checked we were going to search for phone. But one strange airport-service-girl stopped us, she was from service for migrants. And she was explained us that we need to get health insurance. And she asked us to pay, and if we will pay for 1 or 2 years we wil get a very good price. She was really unpleasant because of her pressure. So all her explanations were stopped by: “Ok, well what is the most small period we can pay now, and then to refresh, she said one month…” Ok we made it very quickly, and took our things, few bags with paintings, and were on our way to the exit, when porter tried to stop us offering his help… But really it was not a help. It was only a thing he wanted money. We were angry enough already, and we just took all things and moved to the exit without paying any attention to that guy. The only thing we asked him and other persons was where could we find a phone, but they didn’t know. So we were very close to exit and that price the porter asked, was so unbelievable high for that…
…Mom wanted to smoke after the flying ( she always needs it for relaxing/putting her thoughts in order/for understanding how to be. But in that very moment when we were out of the airport building there was no time for it. The taxi drivers stoped us with a question where we are going to move… “North Av.” – “Ok, 2000 rub. or $80” It was too much for that time. – “No, it’s too high” – “Look, it’s raining, u have the bags with things, and the main reason over 30 minutes the bridges will be opened and it will be impossible to get to the north part till tomorrow morning”. My mother said “Ok, let me think, and finish a cigaret…” – “No time to think, finish in the cab”. So we didn’t have choice…
…Over a few minutes we were running through the city. My first look at it, what i saw hmm… I saw strange city, with old architecture, first as I know now, it was a South part of the city, with architeture of the last years of Soviet Union, then a part which looks like a city of the Revolution Time. Then it changed again, it was already a central part – the old architecture of XVIII – XIX century. We had a conversation with driver while all this surfing through the streets of the city. He asked us about Uzbekistan, about Uzbek. Yeah, for now I have a shame for my and for our answers, I understood sooo much. We told that uzbek don’t let us live there. That it’s too hard for Russians live there. And etc. etc. etc.
Really good thing that he was not so bad person, when we arrived, he asked first to check if the address is correct, and if the person is really lives there where we arrived. We did it and thanks to God, all was ok, and the door was opened. The driver helped us to carry in the bags. We were inside the hall of bilduind with 9 flours, and we needed to moved up to the 7 flour. But funny things, I felt me so strong, and when all were at the 7 flour I was wondered, that it is already a 7 flour, because I supposed it is only a 4 flour…
…The door was opened and strange unknown person stood at the enter…
Sunday – Monday night my dad came back home from his trip. And he brought us a new friend – Jack Black.
Well He is not that Black but he is funny as that comic so he got that name
The most weird thing he smelled weird like a penicillin. And first night he just arrived he took a bath… Pooooooor
And he was hung till next day lunch… Poor Jackie
Here he is at the next day. He has a cute black t-shirt with Statue of Liberty, yeah forgot to tell Jackie is from NY.
So when he was clean we were playing together. I was teaching him my dance. But he has his own style of dancing very different from mine
I hope Yulia will be able to make soon a video of me dancing my feature dance … Starby and Stefan also good for dancing that dance…. I tell you not every bear can dance that one
Jackie is very cute, Hope you like him too.
March 9 -13 2010.
40 x 40 cm
Do you remember “Ratatouille”, when all rats were cleaned up before they could help him on the kitchen. So I made same procedure with my friends and myself as well.
Ghirardelli, first time taking a bath.
Three of us, me ( Sky), Rosie, and Ghirardelli…
Well I am not scared of it anymore… Forth or fifth time for me… I even like my “Jacuzzi” haha…
Poor Rosie, I feel she is scared however smiles…
Three from the top…
This I don’t like, and don’t wish even to my enemy… Look a face of Ghirardelli – he is even angry.
Don’t ask even, Ball never opens her eyes, she is very proud of them, and she does it only in total darkness. You need to deserve she did it. We still don’t…
Best thing = we were hung less than 24 hours ( 14 hours or a bit more)…